Monday, March 2, 2009

Ryan Mallett Drunk, Probably High, Enjoys Smell Of Own Farts

Image Source

Former Michigan quarterback of the future Ryan Mallett was arrested in Arkansas and charged with Public Intoxication after the 20-year-old attempted to get into a bar. This arrest gives Michigan fans another excuse to say "good riddance" and the opportunity to marvel at the incredible mugshot of Mallett post-arrest. After one second of looking at that, I knew what the picture reminded me of:



Some highlights from the arrest report:
Club security alerted police after an underage white male believed to be Mallett was attempting to enter the establishment. Police officers patrolling Dickson Street on foot approached Mallett, who they thought “appeared to be already intoxicated.”

Officers observed Mallett “visibly swaying” when attempting to walk. Mallett, according to the arrest report, smelled of a “heavy odor of intoxicants” and his eyes appeared to be “watery and bloodshot.”

The “faint odor of burnt marijuana coming from Mallett” was also detected by officers. When asked if he had been been smoking marijuana, Mallett denied he had, but later admitted to being around people who had.
Watery and bloodshot eyes, faint odor of the ganja ... but you never inhaled? Can we just rename this "The Arkansas Defense"?

Actually, maybe Mallett is telling the truth. He probably fumbled the exchange, and Mike Hart wasn't there to pick up the pieces.

4 comments:

Mikey said...

And this is the person Arkansas wants as their QB....

caro_nut said...

Looks to me like Arkansas definitely got a better QB than Michigan.....Mike who?

Psycho said...

If he is a good player it doesn't matter if he drinks, he only needs to do it in a more controlled way.
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joseph burrell said...

oh is he really drunk in that picture?? I cannot tell! hahaha, he is a good player and he has helped with my bookmaking position, indirectly of course