Friday, August 22, 2008

Argentina-Team USA Live Blog

Chris Paul (r) defends a punk-ass mark, or a mark-ass punk, aka Luis Scola (l)

What's up everybody, I am up early and ready to go. Some preliminary stuff: unfortunately, Jon will not be joining me this morning, something about him not having a car or leaky tires or something. Best of luck to Jon with that, but what that really means is that I won't have anyone to alert me when something sweet and/or funny happens while I am typing (yeah, I have to look at the keyboard when I type. Shut up). So we'll see what happens.
Second point: Argentina and I have some serious animosity. Not the whole country, of course, just the basketball team. As many of you already know, Manu Ginobili is probably the most hate-able player in the NBA, and if it's not him it's Andres Nocioni. That, and I guess it may have something to do with what happened in Athens in 2004. I will try not to let my bias get too much in the way, but I'm not making any promises. In my opinion, this should be a blowout, but we'll see. Alright tip-off's coming up. Let's go.

9:36-Great tip-in by Kobe off a Dwight miss. Ladies and gentlemen, Dwight Howard's legendary touch around the basket!

7:38-Career-Ending block by Dwight Howard on Luis Scola. Scola thought he could go straight at him. Bad idea.

6:30-Jason Kidd with a long 2! Maybe his second shot of the tournament? Oh, well. Nobody else can shoot, so whatever we can get.

During a timeout-They're showing the game in 2004. I want to throw up.

4:10-Shameless, shameless, shameless flop by Ginobili. Well, if that's what you have to resort to in order to have a chance, then so be it. Seriously, how do you sleep at night?

2:09-After Ginobili goes down with a foot injury, the U.S. has blown the game wide open. Argentina is truly lost without him. He'd better get back in the game; I want there to be no doubt about how much better we are than them. Also, if they want to have a chance to lose by less than 30, he needs to be in the game. Turns out the real one-man team is Argentina.

0:59-Luis Scola is being obnoxious. He's just being ridiculously rough inside. It's like he's the dopey tall skinny white guy playing at a really good court trying to prove to the dudes he's playing with that he's tough and he can hold his own. It's ok, Luis, you don't have to prove your manhood to us.

End of the first quarter-30-9, U.S. Things are going well for us, especially as far as shooting 3's. Turns out we can shoot, too.

7:55-Carmelo for 3. I don't understand why these international teams want to just let us shoot. Maybe 3's aren't our strong point, but we're NBA players. Our weak point is stronger than your strong point.

7:04-Near career-ending block for Nocioni on Kobe. Very impressive.

4:58-Argentina has gotten right back into the game thanks to...their bench? They've just played very well. They've slowed the game down by drawing fouls. It's a good strategy. We'll see if it lasts.

4:06-Pretty savage block on Delfino by Carmelo. Anyone who watches the Pistons recognizes the bricks and ill-advised turnovers from Carlos.

Halftime-We are only up 9. I hate it. I can't stand it. I am sorry I haven't been keeping up with the blog. The truth is, Argentina is playing very well, and the U.S. needs to take them very seriously. Every game for them has been an exhibition so far, and now they're playing in a real game. If they treat it that way, they'll win. If not, we're stupid.

7:09-Jon and I are trying desperately to avert our attention from us being only up 17. Quote from Jon:
"Moldy Bananas. That's a funny phrase."

6:10-The technical situation right now is in complete disarray. Carmelo Anthony just shot four free throws in a row. Nobody is completely sure why. Gotta love international refs.

3:36-There is a guy on Argentina who I swear is related to Todd Jones. Both his face and his gut. We're only up by 18. Kill me now.

2:43-Amazing spin move by Chris Paul. Possibility: Career-Ending Move?

End of the third quarter-14. Crap.

Start of the fourth-Put Tay in the game! They're playing the Final Countdown! I think even if Coach K doesn't put him in, Tay will hypnotically walk onto the court and block someone from behind on a breakaway.

7:17-Lots of moving picks. The refs don't know what those are.

4:42-I hate Luis Scola more than any human on the face of the earth. He is such a bitch I can't stand it. He is showing flashes of skill, but what he's really skilled at is flailing his arms and crying like a girl. Something tells me he's had a lot of practice.

1:31-Dwayne Wade just made Luis Scola very confused. Where's the ball, Luis? Where is it? By the way, 101-81. We aren't going to win by nearly enough.

End of the Game-Well, we only won by 20. Thanks you for putting up with my inconsistent posts. But let me say this: if this is international basketball, not only is it sloppy and slow, but it's not very fun to watch. Give Argentina credit: they were able to slow the game down to their pace. Adapting to international play hasn't been an issue for the U.S. because we've run on everybody. Not today. We had to slow it down and play down to their level. It didn't look very fun, and it wasn't very fun to watch. In the end, I think we have reached Dream Team status if I am saddened by only winning by 20. Next stop: gold medal. Let's get it


Webstarr said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ace said...

ESPN's Current Featured Comment: "Game ball goes to Scola. ... In a losing effort he was easily the best player on the floor." - haze1205

I'm sure Joe agrees wholeheartedly.

Joe said...

I'm coming for haze1205. He;s gettin his